Again, I ask, what the FUCK!?!?!

So, I'm at Zeller's looking for refills for my Intuition razor. Should be simple, right? Well wrong. They have NEW razors, with one refill, for 11 dollars, but that would be a waste, right? But because I have no time to shop somewhere else, and I just want something, I figure it's cheaper to buy a small package of throw-away razors than start a whole-new razor system regime.

So that's what I do, buy something based on price, and not features. Well, whatta mistakeaa to makea. Wow, that was a bad attempt at writing in accent.

Anyhoo, I get these razors home, and I open the package, and I notice this written on it.
"Lavender Scented Handles". Say that once with me people, "Lavender Scented Handles" Hell, don't even bother with the lavender part, just go right to the meat of it....SCENTED HANDLES!?!?!? What jacked-up-on-coke marketing moron (and you have to know it was a guy) thought THIS was a good idea?!?!?

"hey Bob, how are we going to market yet another disposable razor"
"well, my wife likes smelly stuff, let's make it smelly"
"DUDE, you're a GENIUS, what should we make it smell like?"
"well, my grandmother always wore lavender cologne, and women like grandmothers, let's make it smell like a grandmother"
"DUDE, you are ON a ROLL, c'mon let's go tell the boss..."

Why WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY would a HANDLE have to smell nice? I mean, 99 and 44/100ths of the soaps that women use to shave their legs with these things already have a scent, why would they want their razor to compete with that? And what do you have to do to plastic to make it retain a scent, anyway? And LAVENDER? That's supposed to make you drowsy, isn't it DANGEROUS to be prompting people to fall asleep in the shower? People could fall and cut their head open? Or razor their juggler during the fall? It's TOO RISKY.

The Bic news release contained these words "first lavender scented triple-blade disposable shaver" , in their February 4, 2005 news release. I dunno about you, but I sure haven't seen a whole rush of other companies launching THEIR lavender scented triple-blade disposable shavers in order to 'keep up with the Jones'. Hey Bic, maybe that's a sign that you should pull this ridiculous product.

Sue
p.s. they don't so much as SMELL of Lavendear, as they STINK of CHEAP LAVENDER COLOGNE GONE STALE. Which on a scale of 1 to GROSSEST THING TO SMELL FIRST THING IN THE MORNING DURING YOUR SHOWER, it's off the scale